Lyz Lenz

Lyz Lenz

Managing editor of the Rumpus.

Email: Eclenz@gmail.com

  • 217
    stories
  • 220K
    words
Ask the matriarchy article
Jezebel

Ask the Matriarchy

I wrote a four-part advice column for Jezebel called Ask the Matriarchy that specialized in no bullshit parenting advice.

Disneycruise article
Jezebel

My Beautiful Shit-Denying Twisted Fantasy of a Disney Cruise

I went on a magical vacation and thought about murder.

Christmascardtime article
Jezebel

Oh, Fuck Me, It's Christmas Card Time Again

Oh, Fuck Me, It's Christmas Card Time Again

Timout031 article
Jezebel

How to Send Your Daughter to a Time-Out...in the Patriarchy!

How to Send Your Daughter to a Time-Out...in the Pa...

Akjvu7v973qrysfm2ziq article
Jezebel

A Short, Freakish History of Mothers Harming Their Children For Money

At the end of the sixteenth century, there was an infant in France with an excess of skin on its head. The parents of the child were poor and carried their infant from town to town, putting him on display for profit. When they reached Paris, a magistrate questioned them,...

Mtadyybxuutjgtflbo6t article
Jezebel

A History of Lithopedions: When a Fetus Turns to Stone

In ancient Greek mythology, after the great flood, Deucalion and Pyrrha repopulated the world by scattering stones throughout the earth. From these stones emerged people; from these people grew the world. It's a myth, but its opposite is possible. Sometimes, humans turn to stone....

S98jn1c86aggbsuasofy article
Jezebel

What's Up With Triclosan?

If you've ever used a public toilet, watched someone eat on the subway, or had a toddler wipe their nose on your pants, you understand the desire to rub anti-bacterial soap all over your body. I'm not even a clean person, but after seeing up close and personal how much...

Hk6vuus7xxcumjgbbtkm article
Jezebel

The Legend of Countess Margaret, Who Birthed 365 Mouse-Sized Children

Here is how the story goes: One day, the Countess Margaret of Henneberg met a poor woman who said she was carrying twins. The countess was confounded by the prospect of birthing two children at the same time. She told the poor woman that the only way twins were possible...

1483937867959847235 article
Jezebel

What's Up With Free Radicals?

Searching for the perfect moisturizer feels like the hunt for the Holy Grail. I’m pushing 33, a mother of two (and one of these children likes to procure knives and sneak nail clippers into school, so this is rapidly advancing my aging process), and Instagram filters no longer hide the...

I7pegmhxsxreio70xg9m article
Jezebel

What's Up With Plastic Microbeads?

"What's Up With...?" is a regular feature exploring fearsome ingredients in beauty products. If there's one you're curious about/scared of, leave us a comment and we'll try to suss it out....

1433252047388152134 article
Jezebel

What's Up With Hair Straightening Treatments?

My mom used to tell me “beauty is pain” when she’d unsnarl sticks from my hair or held the crimper a little too close to my scalp. She was right, of course, beauty is pain and sometimes sickness or worse....